Spotlight: Melissa D.

This blog isn't getting updated as often as I mean to update it. Sorry, everyone!

Today's Spotlight is my very good friend Melissa. I think I'll just let her amazing story speak for itself:

I graduated in Communications with an emphasis in Broadcast Journalism. I worked in radio news, I also worked at UVSC as Assistant Director of Women in Technology, mostly doing communications/public relations type things for them including hosting my own internet talk radio show.

Working in the media or communications is a great preparation for being a mom! I've been in environments where you are working under constant deadlines and pressure, and you only have one chance to get it right! After you've learned to live with that kind of stress, it makes those hectic moments as a mommy not seem quite so bad. You know those moments...when your two-year-old has spilled juice all over the floor, you baby has a poop disaster, your husband is calling needing you to pick him up from work because his bike has a flat, and someone's at the door...ALL AT THE SAME TIME! Everybody has had those moments, right? :) In addition to that, I look back on some of things I had to deal with while working and I think...I don't need that in my life again, I'm so happy to be a mom!

Being a mother has always been my dream. While I've had lots of dreams and goals I've pursued, motherhood was always foremost at the top. It was never a big decision to become a stay-at-home mom, it was a dream come true. At the same time I think it's important for mothers to remember that being a stay-at-home mom is a choice we all had to make at one point or another. Others outside of our realm might like to say, 'oh, you couldn't find anything better to do so you kind of of just ended up at home.' No, that is not the case! I am a talented, bright, ambitious woman and there are many things and causes I could devote my energy and talents to. Instead I choose to be a mom and to be a stay-at-home mom because nobody can be a mommy to my little boy and little girl like I can. It is a choice and sometimes, especially on rough days, it's a choice I have to make everyday...but it's what I chose to do and I'm going to stick with it no matter what!

I am not wasting my time at all! When I choose to be a mother and bring those little spirits into this world...I am taking on the responsibility of raising them and taking care of them. Somebody has to raise those kids...who better for the job than their mother? And we've all heard it before, I'm not just staying at home, I am raising and teaching our future generation so they can go out and make their influence on the world as well.

Some of my favorite things about having kids are those little moments...those moments that just happen with your children that you can't plan. Seeing my little boy giggle at grasshoppers hopping as we walk down the road, and then seeing him try to hop like them. Watching my little girl smile and laugh as her brother dances in front of her. And also just being able to be a kid again and see the world through their eyes...it makes the simplest things in life so exciting.

I think some of the most challenging parts about being a mom are the mundane things that have to be done over and over again. The dishes, the laundry, the cleaning, the dressing, the bathing, the cooking...they have to be done over and over again every single day and they really aren't that exciting and it feels like when you finally finish them they all have to be done again! When you are really tired or worn out you just have to make yourself do those things to keep the house running. It can be tough sometimes. Also, is the limited interaction and stimulating conversation. I love to talk, and to talk things out. And while I don't mind talking with my two-year-old, sometimes I wouldn't mind taking it up a notch and discussing politics or current events etc. That's why it's important to still have good friendships and get out with other women every once in awhile.

Again the most rewarding parts of staying at home are those little moments. Seeing them roll over, walk, talk etc for the first time. Seeing the things that make them laugh, the funny things they do...and not having to miss out on a second of it.

I don't know that I would say I have had any regrets overall. But I would say that I have had moments. I remember this one time when my little boy (my first baby) was sick. I was a new mom, he was only about 3 or 4 months old. It had been a long day, and a long night before. I was tired. I was holding him on the couch while he was sleeping and watching the local news, and suddenly I saw a girl I went to school with there reporting a news story. She did a good job, and she looked so sharp and put together...especially when compared to myself. I had been lucky to get a shower that day, my hair was pulled back in a ponytail...and I had spit up and baby tylenol stains on my shirt. For a second I thought, oh man look at her, she's this successful reporter and I'm just sitting here on the couch watching TV! But then I thought of how sick my little guy had been and I remembered thinking, but I'm here taking care of my baby. I don't want any one else taking care of him, I'm his mommy, I'm the best person for the job! Sometimes I do have those moments wondering, 'what I could have been', but then I realize that I am happy right where I'm at, I'm following my dreams and doing a job that nobody else can do but me.

Advice for a new mom...welcome to mommyhood! And don't be so hard on yourself. Us women are really good at being hard on ourselves and thinking that we always fall short...especially when it comes to being a mom. The truth is your are your kids mom and nobody else is...you know what's best, and you are probably doing a much better job than you think you are! We all figure out how to be a mommy and navigate this world in our own special way, so trust in yourself and the choices you make for you and your family...because nobody can be a mother to your family like you can.

I think every mom makes sacrifices! I've been out with a back injury the last month or so...most likely it came from having my baby! We sacrifice our bodies, our time, our energy, sometimes our health, our everything! and all the things that maybe 'we could be doing' instead of being a mom. But it is so worth it! Every time I hold my sleeping baby, or watch my little boy playing I am reminded of that. There is more to life than racking up our list of accomplishments, and having children brings a depth to your life it is really hard to get any other way. They have helped me learn how to be more patient, more loving, more flexible, and unselfish. And in return I get unconditional love.

Other interests include running, writing, music, and spending time with family and friends.

I have always been one to try and live my life to the fullest...no matter what stage I've been at. There's a time and a season for everything...right now my season is being a mother to young children and I'm going to live it up and enjoy this part of my life to it's fullest extent. Because I know there will be a time I will look back and miss it!